Flip flops had a bad day.

[CureZen]

 

As a man of science you're not supposed to believe in karma. That being said, if it were ever proven to exist I doubt he would've been surprised.

 

Spawn in as a scientist, and swiftly begin to choke out the monkey in the testing area. Because fuck that monkey. He will push you away from whatever your working on 60% of the time, every time. This it seems, would begin flipflops' decent into death. Decide to dispose of corpse via testing new chem. Theoretically should ignite on a delayed reaction. Lay it down in a beaker with the corpse and a tape recorder to time it. Decide to go get some stuff from RnD in the mean time.

 

RnD is a cluster fuck as usual, with everyone sort of running in and using the computer as they please regardless of whose using it at the moment. Wait until everyone is gone which takes about five minutes. Quickly find out that five minutes was spent doing dick all and the research levels are at level two at best. Spend three minutes boosting what I can just to get the stuff I want and then give up when someone comes back and takes over the terminal again. Decide to head back to lab.

 

Testing area is covered in a pink smoke and various walls are gone exposing it to space. Tape recorder is gone. monkey is apparently not only alive, but still on fire and screaming. Which is weird because it didn't have a pulse when I left it there. Inquire about it to scientist in fire fighter gear attempting to repair it, and they said the fire melted the walls. As someone whose filled those walls with flaming plasma I conclude that they just accidentally melted the walls with poly acid and are trying to shift blame. Annoyed I storm off and go find some air canisters to restore working air supply.

 

After what feels like an eternity looking around in maintenance, stop giving a shit and go back to RnD. Zero progress was made. Say fuck everything and produce a mining drill and shuffle off to HoP's office.

 

HoP isn't there. Apparently the captain shot off his legs or some shit but had enough time to shutter down his entire station. Try to call him back and start smashing windows to allow me to get into line. Botanist decides to disarm me and steal my drill and run off. Chase him and he starts beating me with it. Eventually lose sight, give up, and make a new drill and get back in line. Angrily inform HoP of my shit day and tell him to either "give me miner's access so I can get off this shit station, or I'm gonna start making bombs" Gives me what I thought was miner's access and I follow a fellow miner onto the shuttle and go to work. Eventually have a lovely collection of silver gold and diamond. Head back to station and find that I don't have access to any of the doors...

 

HoP had given me partial access, and I couldn't even leave let alone redeem any of the stuff I had mined out.

 

 

Fuck off into the great unknown armed with mining equipment and a tool belt I stole from cargo. Arrive on commie station and repair solars. Dick about for a bit before realizing I'm running a fever. Decide to move on before I die of something, eventually collide with station again. Walk into medical and eventually talk to a surgeon. He fixes my lungs, and injects me with spaceacillin. After I mention I still appear to be dying he checks again and apparently my heart is now malfunctioning.

 

And then fuck If I know what happens next because he puts me under and as far as I know I die there. The shuttle gets called and he drags me down to it, but ditches me at some point in the hallway while I'm still on the anesthetic and when it runs out I start suffocating to death. Game freezes and crashes and I just give up on SS13 for the day.

 

Flip Flops did not have a good day.