TullyBBurnalot

I can honestly say I like my own reactions to that.

Well, technically speaking, using the analyzer is as simple as clicking something on the screen and waiting for the information to pop up. Comparing evidence really falls down to personal thought processes and logical thinking.

3.5: Steal all the flasks from the bar and fill them with booze.

Well, if the area is crowded, odds are you're probably never going to get any forensics done, especially if it's a high civilian round. As for keeping records, I just tend to write down anything and record myself talking in the off-chance someone actually wants backup copies of my data (which usually doesn't happen, either because they trust me or because they don't care).

Once more, whoever coded that, THANK YOU SO UNBELIEVABLY MUCH.

So, you want to be part of the proud few? Feel like donning a longcoat and cool hat and go around chain smoking and solving crimes? Well beat that out of your head, that's not how a Detective works. You're a Forensic Technician, not a Film Noir actor. Step 1: Your Tools You can find most of your crime fighting tools inside your office, but some of them you'll need to go further away. Here's a full list of what you'll need as a proper Detective: The Scanner: This is your bread and butter. With the recent changes, you no longer have a High-Res Scanner computer in your office. Instead, the new scanner shows you prints, blood types and whatever fibers were in that thing you scanned on the spot. I don't think I need to explain to you why this is useful as all hell. The Laptop: Related to the above, it is EXTREMELY important (seriously, can't stress this enough) to carry around a laptop at all times. Seeing as you can now scan things on the spot, carrying around a laptop will give you quick access to both medical and security records (you get those by default as a Detective) so you can match records to evidence. From personal experience, carrying around a laptop is what distinguishes a case well solved from a murder investigation that drags on for 2 hours. Obtainable from the laptop vendor near Cargo. The Revolver: This is your baby. Treat is as such. And reskin it to The Peacemaker option. Accept no substitutes. In all seriousness, this is your own personal taser. It fires .38 rubber bullets, but can also chamber the VERY LETHAL .357 rounds. In no circumstance should you carry these around unless given specific permission by the HoS and/or Captain. Couple of .357s to the face will kill anything. As it stands, the .38 round can instantly stun regardless of where you hit, and can easily be made via autolathe (usually, Cargo will ask no questions). Make sure to keep it on "instant fire" rather than the "hostage" option, as the latter WILL waste all your bullets in a half-second if the person being aimed at moves. Remember, the revolver will teach you how to shoot properly, as one round is more than enough. The Handcuffs: You're not a Security Officer, but carry around at least two pairs at all times, for quite obvious reasons. Obtainable from your office and any SecVendor in the station. The Seclite: Keep this in your suit slot and on at all times, it will save your life. Comes with every Security Belt. The Security Belt: Keeps your cuffs and ammo in an easy to access package. Obtainable from Security Lockers. The HUD Sunglasses: Allows for quick identification of wanted personnel, as well as jobs. For obvious reasons, incredibly useful, and should really come by default. Also stops flashes from working on you. Obtainable from Security Lockers. Smokes and Lighter: Fine, you can chain smoke. Hat and Longcoat: And yes, you can look cool doing your job. Your coat also serves the purpose of holding two extra items. I recommend the police tape and custom flask. Which, of course, leads to... The Tape: The police tape serves a dual purpose: first, it allows you to cordon off areas to law-abiding citizens and keep crime scenes clear from any disturbance. Second, it gives you reasonable justification to shoot someone in the groin and throw them out if they decide to ignore the very obvious "STAY OUT" sign and break it so they can robust you can take the body away. On a side note, if one of your fellow officers does that, follow the same logic. Being a Sec Officer does not give you the authority to desecrate a crime scene. Obtainable from your office and Security Lockers. The Flask: As a Detective, you can't get drunk. You also get a custom flask that holds 60 units of any liquid. Do the math. The Recorder: Useful for taking witness statements or for those pesky criminals who insist on having every conversation recorded so they can b*tch to the IAA and still get brigged because they obviously committed a crime. Also useful for when you have an anal-retentive Magistrate who insists on having everything done by the book or else he releases the prisoner (PS: don't be that guy). The Spares: You'll find a bunch more stuff in your office you'll never use. The camera is borderline useless, the armor takes away your suit slots for a defensive bonus you shouldn't really need in the first place, f*ck Space Law, we've read that a million times already, and none of the other suits look as awesome. Keep in mind, your closet does contain a spare scanner in the off chance you lost yours, as well as serving as a convenient hiding place for whatever you have to hide. The Evidence Lockers: Evidence goes here, logically. Don't keep it in bags, you need those, just dump the actual items in the thing and close it. If it's a particularly sensitive item, you might want to weld it shut or transfer the item to the Evidence Lockers north of the Brig. I believe that is all. Let's move on. Step 2: Understand your access In terms of access, you differ from the Security Officer in two points: First, you have access to the morgue, granting you a second point of entry to Medbay and a convenient way of analyzing murder victims without having to pester a doctor to do it. Second, while you can go into them, you can't set the timers on the cells. That goes in line with your RP orientation, as you are meant to conduct investigations, not detain criminals. However, being a Detective carries a not-so-immediately-obvious perk: asking the HoP for improved access, as long as it's within reason (such as Medbay, Science, Kitchen and Hydroponics, and maybe even the ability to set timers on cells), will usually result in it being given to you without questions. You're a Detective, and as such are held to a higher standard than most Security Officers. Command trusts you, and they especially trust your ability to find criminals. They'll be willing to give you access most of the time. Make sure not to abuse it. Step 3: Understand your role You are not a Security Officer. You are not meant to go around shooting people and brigging them for crimes real or imagined. Your job is to find crime scenes, investigate them to the best of your ability and then set Security on the right path to doing their job. The only situation where your direct intervention is required is when an investigation reveals an obvious culprit, in which case, go ahead and apprehend them before they do any more damage. If, however, your sleuthing reveals only possible suspects, let Security handle it. Of course, all this goes out the window if Security is incompetent/nonexistent (ie: most of the time), in which case feel free to apply justice yourself. In all honesty, this is what's going to happen either way, as Security will almost always be too slow to react to get anything done in any feasible amount of time. Just remember that you're supposed to be an investigator, not a cop, and you should act as such. Act when you know that not doing so will result in unnecessary damage to station/crew. Step 4: How to Act How you go about your business is, of course, a matter of personal preference, as is your character personality. However, here are a few pointers: Be Polite: Going "bad cop" on someone will result in precisely 0 results in 100% of cases (exception might be made if the person in question is really into roleplay and is willing to look past the apparent shitcurity facade). Be nice to people. Be nice to witnesses, suspects and criminals alike. It will make witnesses more cooperative, suspects more likely to come without a fight, and might even make actual criminals more likely to cooperate with Security and scratch out a deal. If nothing else, it will infuriate criminals who try to get a reaction out of you, and that's funny as hell. Not to mention, nice guys don't actually finish last. People will legitimately like you if you act nice towards them. Be Efficient: Taking 15 minutes to investigate a crowbar left in maintenance will probably result in you getting your sorry ass fired. Taking 5 minutes to investigate a double homicide and producing evidence that link it to a specific person? I got medals for that (or should, at least, *grumble grumble*). Your job is to investigate, and a corollary to that is that you're supposed to do that without wasting any more time than is necessary. Learn to prioritize. Do you scan the body first or the surroundings? Do you go for an autopsy and then come back for the crime scene? Simple tricks like copy pasting the strings you get will save you a hell of a lot of time in the long run, allowing you to more effectively deal with crime. Have a Plan: Learn people's jobs by sight. Know their patterns, their access levels, what they should be doing. Devise plans on how to arrest someone without them realizing you were even there (extra access helps). Know when to strike, or if you should even strike. Know the station inside-out, it's nooks and crannies, every spot that could be used to hide a body or murder weapon. Keep tabs on high-risk individuals, or even set up codewords (having the AI shout a codeword over radio if their Upload gets trespassed is a stupidly easy and stupidly useful idea). "Know thy enemy and know thyself. In a hundred battles, you will lose not one" - Sun Tzu, The Art of War Step 5: The Crew Here's a handy breakdown of the types of people that you'll encounter and what to do with them: Helpful Witness: Would you like to be pulled over by some random guy with a revolver drawn out who then starts frisking you without answering your questions and threatens to shoot you in the face every time you move? Related to the above point of being nice, tell the witness why you're there, what you're there for and what's expected of them. If they have questions, answer them to the best of your ability, and let them cooperate rather than forcing a cooperation. The Helpful Witness will provide you with everything you need, assuming you displayed some decency. Unhelpful Witness: Same as the above, but you should kindly point out that it's Code Blue/Red and he/she is legally obliged to assist you. The Unhelpful can easily be turned to the Helpful if you treat them nice enough, but if they don't, keep it succinct and the to the point, and avoid pissing them off too much. Willing Suspect: Related to the Helpful Witness. Tell them they're wanted in a current investigation and ask them to accompany you to the brig. More often than not, these are not the culprits, but don't let this serve as a rule of thumb. Plenty of criminals act unfailingly polite specifically to get your guard down. Unwilling Suspect: You've tried your best to convince them to come quietly. Draw your revolver, maybe even point at it. Inform them that they are coming to the brig, and it's their choice on whether or not they come with their hands untied. More often than not will require a bullet to the face to be cooperative. Cooperative Criminal: A rare breed. Will let you handcuff him/her and search through their belongings. Usually accompanied by fairly decent RP. Ask them about any collaborators or known accomplices. Make sure they get their sentences reduced, or, in extreme cases like being a traitor/changeling/vampire, get a loyalty implant so they can return to regular duties. Remember, they helped you. Now help them. Uncooperative Criminal: The easiest one to deal with, honestly. Being a dick to Security? Check. Insulting your mother? Check. Yelling "shitcurity!"? Triple check. Complaining to the admins about abuse? You'd be depressed how often this happens. This guy has all the evidence in the world thrown at him and refuses to do anything but yell expletives at you. Brig him with a harsher sentence (throw in Insulting an Officer on Duty and stack it up, always works) or, in worse cases, give them a front row seat to the incinerator/crematorium. Neutral Criminal: These ones come in without a word or struggle and get out without a word or struggle. Apply regular sentences. Step 6: The Crime Scene Investigation Your job. Here's a handy breakdown of what you'll find. The Body: Obviously someone who got murdered. Remove their clothing and check their items for prints or blood. Checking their coats and uniforms is a great way of finding fibers and prints (or would be, it seems to only rarely work). Bringing this body to the morgue and performing an autopsy can break a case wide open, and has in fact led to me several times figuring out there were changelings operating on the station. Prints: The manna of the gods. Leads to a very clear and defined suspect. Can be found on pretty much any surface, but can also be thwarted by wearing any glove that isn't latex. Remember, scan everything. Blood: Perfect way of figuring out who or what was assaulted if no body is present, unless the murderer went the extra mile and got someone else's blood, put it in a vial, cleaned out the previous blood and splashed the new one in its place (PS: please don't do this). Can also break the case wide open when you figure out that what appeared to be a simple suicide can in fact turn out to be something far more sinister... Fibers: Will almost never lead to a specific suspect (except in the case of Heads or unique-outfit jobs, like miners), but can almost always narrow down your list of suspects. Let's imagine you find three sets of prints on a murder weapon, one belonging to a Doctor, another to a Roboticist and another belonging to the Botanist. However, the body itself only has fibers from latex gloves. Do the math. Witnesses: Useful beyond mortal comprehension. LISTEN TO THESE PEOPLE, THEY CAN PRACTICALLY SOLVE YOUR CASE BY THEIR MERE EXISTENCE. Final Step: Accept your fate Everything you do is your job. Expect no special recognition for finding a thief or murderer beyond the occasional "Good job". You are here to solve crimes, and that's your satisfaction. You're doing it for Justice, not Honor or Glory. Go out into the world, young Detective. A cosmos of psychopaths awaits. Signed, - Jonah Marigold Bright

In all honesty, being able to remove someone's head with 1-2 hits was REALLY overpowered.

On an ENTIRELY unrelated note, I've taken to carrying my axe on me at all times.

I ALWAYS have tie to supercool plasma. Unless a civilian decides to self-antag and breach the station, like every other round for the past few days when the admins weren't on.

It's a cheap, no-effort way of dealing with a problem and I'll have none of it!

NO FECKIN' SPACE VENTS, DAGNABBIT!

I've taken to ignoring the gas cooling aspect though. Rarely anyone goes SM anyway.

Told you it worked. I'll take the tips into consideration though, especially the pump ones.

Thanks for the feedback. Please note, however, that this is the EXACT same system you complained about. I just tore out the bits that weren't being used, making it far easier to understand. The Waste to Filter bypass is indeed for when I'm cooling gas, and I never use it if there's actual waste that needs filtering. The space loop I've recently noticed is useless, but I'm keeping it on the off chance the code actually changes so it works. As for the rest, I'll incorporate it into the design. Thanks!

NO VENTS.

As requested by the one and only David Buck, here's my own Atmospherics setup for him to tear apart from a higher experienced ground. Foreword: This system is a modified version of the one Ryder Holderman (I believe his name was) taught me when I first started atmos. It is, contrary to what you might believe, not that micromanagement intensive, so long as you leave the valves in the right setting. Also, I apologize for the poor imaging quality (ie, massive black spaces because I suck at graphic design). Anyway, let's begin, shall we? Stage One: The Buffer This is the easy part. Essentially, the point is to use the Gas Mix Control area to hold excess waste gas in case of either major overpressure, fire, or toxins leak. Seeing as you can't actually flood the station with harmful gas in most circumstances, you might as well just use that for something. By turning the yellow valve and activating the volume pump towards the Gas Mix, you're forcing the waste air to dump straight into the latter. When it's all done, you activate the pump coming OUT of the Gas Mix and let portions of the waste be processed by turning the yellow valve on and off, so as to not clog the system. Another note: You should ALWAYS make the distro loop separate from everything else, or an enterprising Malf might actually flood the station with plasma. ONWARDS! Stage Two: The Main Loop IMPORTANT NOTE: This is THE default loop this setup uses. 99% of the time, even with the fully finished product, you'll only be using this particular pipeline. Now, to explain. This setup is quite simple, as it is a Two Part System: The first part involves taking all the waste air and pumping it into the space loop, cooling it down; The second part involves taking that air, sending it into the freezers to assure it's properly cooled, then just venting it to the Filter Loop. Most of the time, this takes about half a second, but it WILL take longer in case of a fire. That's what Stage One is for (see above). Red Arrows indicate Waste Air Flow. Yellow Arrows indicate Cooled Waste Air Flow. Stage 3: Direct Jury Rigging IMPORTANT NOTE: You can literally stop at Stage 2. The system works as such, and still leaves you room for modifications. EVERYTHING from this point onward is not strictly necessary. Anyway, this is quite simple. Installing a valve in that position allows you to bypass the cooling bit entirely and just vent all the waste directly into filtering. For obvious reasons, don't leave this alone for a long time, you don't know when something's gonna happen. Like plasma fires. Stage 4: Looping to Loop Sometimes, a single run through the cooling system isn't enough. Maybe it's as hot as the surface of the sun. Maybe you want to super cool nitrogen for the Supermatter (see below in Stage 6). For that purpose, you install the pumps and the yellow circled valve, as indicated. As you'll see in the finished product, switching the valve so the green indicator goes down means everything currently being cooled will remain in the cooling loop until you switch the valve again. Stage 5: Manual Mixing I'm gonna paraphrase David Buck and say this: having a good mix system and a waste disposal system is just not practical. And, well, only one of those actually helps anyone but you directly. Take a guess. For that end, just remove the entirety of the original mixing loop and hook up connectors to the Nitrogen and various toxins Control areas. Then, drag canisters on top and get ready to open and close valves. Stage 6: Cool as Ice (minus an extra 200) YET ANOTHER IMPORTANT NOTE: If you do not have people working on the Supermatter, skip this bit and ignore it in the Final Product, as you will NOT need it. Basically, this is for when someone's manning the Supermatter Reactor and they need super cooled plasma for the Collectors and super cooled Nitrogen/Carbon Dioxide as coolant for the system itself. Here are the steps: 1) Make sure both the indicated valves have the indicators DOWN. This means all the gas you pump into the cooling loop REMAINS in the cooling loop. 2) Put the canister full of gas in the top connector, open the valve, and pump it into the loop; 3) Let the gas cool. Having meters helps a lot, but you can also check via the freezers; 4) Once the gas is cool enough, turn the top-most yellow circled valve so it faces the bottom connector; 5) Put an empty canister in the bottom connector, open the pump, and pump all the cooled gas into the canister; 6) Rinse and repeat for whatever gas you want to cool Experience has told me that 3 full canisters of room temperature gas (around 4500Kpa) can fill up a single canister if you cool it down enough (usually 100 Kelvin or below). Final Product Fairly self explanatory by now. Does not include the super cooling system. Red: Waste Air Yellow: Waste to Filter optional Purple: Cooling Loop As always, I'm open to critique/suggestions from anyone. No pointing out that one time I may or may not have given the Blueshield a canister of plasma.

Well, so be it then. Moral of the story: plasma is dangerous, kids.

Maybe the AI electrified the doors and one of them tried to open it? *shrugs* I will admit, I was staring blankly at the console, seeing all the little green triangles turn red.

Also, it WAS hilarious. I knew from the second I gave the Blueshield that canister that THAT EXACT THING would happen, which is why I ahelped it to warn the admins beforehand. For his part, Dave could only stare in disbelief as to why in hell I would ever give him the canister. The response? "But Command was fine with it" Nuremberg defense, go!

Did any of the prisoners have ANYTHING on them that could produce a flame?

The shift started out rather nicely. Near a hundred people working aboard the station, only the occasional murder and maiming and a CE that was kind enough to leave Atmos alone as long as we didn't blow apart half the station. And to top it all off, lovely Rose Le Blanc was my Atmos partner, and I spent the first twenty minutes feeling incredibly useful teaching her how Atmosia worked. Everything went perfectly fine, and nothing wrong was going to ever happen. Ever. And then someone yells "Cult in Chapel!". I instinctively grab my multitool and pull out the fire axe, sending a PDA message to Rose, warning her to get something to defend herself. As befitting a proper Atmosian, she grabbed the crowbar from her toolbelt and displayed the most terrifying grin while wielding it. Brought a tear to my eye, it did. And so the station falls to paranoia. Cult here, cult there, cult everywhere. In the meantime, my CE (the one and only Kitachi, bless his Voxy soul) was asking me for super-cooled plasma, and I had fun rewiring the system to make it happen. I would come to rue the day I came out of Atmospherics when I did. Outside Engineering, speaking to the CE, was the Blueshield. Coming (supposedly) with orders from Command, he asked me for a canister full of plasma. I was a bit apprehensive, but I wasn't about to doubt the Blueshield when he says he's acting on orders, and the CE was fine with it. So I left the super-cooled plasma with the CE and went back to get another canister, this one at room temperature. I gave it to the Blueshield and almost immediately ahelped to let our lords and masters know sh*t was probably going to hit the fan. After a minor leak of unknown origins in the Permabrig, the Captain came down to Atmos to demand answers, at which point I told him the system was not wired to allow external tampering (ie, removed the mix-to-distro pump), which somehow made the Captain suspect me less. Acting on my well-warranted paranoia, I told the Captain about the Blueshield's plasma antics. He was perfectly fine with it. I could feel chills going down my spine. Rose PDAs me a message stating she's getting firefighting gear. Bless her heart. Five minutes. Ten minutes. Suddenly, someone calls out that the "lambs have been sacrificed". Thirty seconds later, everything from the Permabrig to the HoP's office is on fire with Red Alerts on the Atmos Computer. (at this point, I issued a formal complaint against myself in ahelp) Final Situation: All atmos alarms were successfully dealt with (even the Permabrig, with proper repairs), but Atmos was left with piping pressures exceeding 10000Kpa and temperatures upwards of 5000 ºC (without even panic syphoning) that would've probably taken the better part of a shift to de-clog. Thank my lucky stars the shuttle was called, because by that point I was surprised I hadn't been banned yet. Long Story Short: don't give non-Atmos personnel anything from Atmos.