The legend of the man who was more chill than ice cream itself

[borderlinecrazy]

It was a normal shift, Assistants hacking vendors, Engineers not doing anything because they're "Busy", Trigger-happy officers "accidentally" shooting the seemingly-innocent clown, People being kidnapped in maints, Just another day at work. And a man named "Samson Letterman" decided he wanted to go building this shift, So he went and got himself the tools and access he needed, Dealt with the ever-so-lazy HoP, Messaged the drunk captain for permission, Asked the gods for guidance, Suited up with a space suit, And began building... A little longue for all to hang out, With cigarettes and other thingies.

He watched as the crew did their shenanigans, Simply pointing and laughing, As the silliness of the station could not be matched by even the best circus in all the galaxy, Ordering himself food and sharing it with others as well, Talking about their day (or rather, Shift), Discussing important things such as everything-but-politics and the weather, Having a fun time all around, Ignoring the threats about, And taking their time to sit down and relax.

But then, A greater threat appeared, What the cool kids nowadays call "Blob", Now this threat was so massive that they had authorized cargo to get guns for the station, Which is a terrible idea given the type of people who tend to work as cargo technicians, Surprised a cargonia was not formed, Which would have been tragic yet not surprising.

After receiving this news, Sam did not even flinch, As he kicked his feet up, Stretched his arms, Gave a good long yawn, And went on with his activity of being the most chill man on the milky way.

Alas, In the end, He died doing what he loved, What every man should inspire to-- okay this is way too fucking stupid to continue on writing lmao im tired

 

[borderlinecrazy]

spent way too much time on this