Jerry Swanzibalii

[Tylander]

 

Name: Jerry Swanzibalii

Age: 63

Gender: Male

Race: Human

Blood Type: O-

General Occupational Role(s): Clown, Civilian

 

Biography: Not much is known about this man, him being a washed up space pirate, but he says he had many accounts of great feats. This is account of one of thethings that sticks out the most in Jerry's mind.

"It was a windy Gas storm with hydrogen and carbon mixin' t' creatin' torrential explosions and all that you would find in that kind o' space weather, me and me crew where coastin' t' edge o' t' gravity wells just comin' out o' t' freak o' t' space when all o' a sudden we saw what most people in our occupation would say is t' beauty o' t' sea. It was a sight, double Saturn IX engines, a large cargo hold, and most o' all a visible livin' quarters, t' kind you would see people with high standards use. Aye she was a gem, a gem this crew would plunder in a heartbeat. After firin' t' warnin' shots and raisin' t' flag we noticed that instead o' stoppin' like normal traffic this ship sped up its massive engines and tried t' escape, runnin' wasn't a good idea. We sped our Intergalactic Mark III engines up and started a a chase, though it didn't last long due t' our engines bein' vastly superior and t' fact that we had guns. Upon boardin' we were greeted not with scared t' death people but gun wieldin' fancy folk that took out almost half me crew but eventually we made it t' t' bridge. Heart poundin', a few new scars from t' firefight I busted t' find t' real jewel o' the ship. Her hair was golden, her eaye gleamin' like a emerald yet on fire with fearlessness, and finally her posture, without any jitters or stutters she stands firm on t' metal floor with a laser pistol pointed at me head. The captain o' t' ship didn't look like a captain but instead a Space Siren hidin' in beauty t' draw jack tars t' them, though I did not see any flaw within that soul and when she got a better look at me I could see that fire in her eye dissipate. After a brutal twenty minutes o' negotiatin' we had struck a deal with t' captain, or Joan, we packed up and took off empty handed, well almost, but it did not matter because half o' t' crew was went t' Davy Jones' locker and I can just give t' other half last raids pay. But upon just loosin' sight o' t' ship I look at t' real treasure I have taken, which will soon rise t' be me first mate and me only "mate" if you know what I mean."

 

Qualifications: None

 

Employment Records: Recorded abuse on station children while being intoxicated in a clown suit

 

Security Records:

 

*Case 13254: Plundering of common starships, sentenced 25 years in prison

*notes: Let out on good behavior.

 

*Case 65731: Accused of stealing prince kalahandira's solid gold, gem encrusted bottle of whiskey. Never accused do to lack of evidence

*notes: Bottle was never found again.

 

*Case 75390: Multiple Homicides to the 1st degree, Stealing private property, Destruction of government owned space liners, Accusations of rape, Acts of violence with armed guns, and Multiple banks heists involving the following people: Bud Hornigold, Joan Bones, Billy Slashface, and multiple other that escaped during incident. Sentenced to life in prison.

*Never accounted for in prison roll-call, assumed to still be at large.

 

Medical Records:

 

*Has trouble sleeping at night contently screaming about a woman name Joan.

*Prefers to drink all day and not get anything done.

*When asked about past he blankly stares into the area and reminisce like a mindless zombie.

 

Appearance: Standing at a 5'11" ,has a stereotypical old man hair with a long beard to match, large brown eyes and a average shoe size. Police examiner writes "Upon examining Jerry more you can see that he has a peg-leg for his right leg, not only that but you can see that he doesn't have a left arm. Judging by his appearance and that he hasn't shaved in awhile (plus his odor) he looks like he hasn't bathed in years, possibly centuries even."

 

 

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