Guide to Telescience

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What is this strange place?

Telescience is a single room at the south end of the Research department hallway.

This area focuses on teleportation, both sending and receiving. It is equipped with a Telepad, a secure room to teleport people and things in and out of, and several handheld GPS readers.

Telescience is relatively easy, and in the right hands can be a great aid... or detriment to the station.

Do remember, you have to know college-level calcu---- hahahah fuck no, did you pass six grade? Yes? Well you're ready for telescience!

The telepad console has 3 settings:

X-Value Y-Value Z-Value

To simplify this, picture the game as being on a huge graph, because it pretty much is. The X value defines the X axis. Hence, this will affect the western and eastern positions. The Y value defines the Y axis. Hence, this will affect the northern and southern positions. The Z value defines the Z level. There are many levels. One contains the station, one contains the Derelict, another contains Central Command, ETC. Certain Z levels may not be reached, such as the Central Command, due to them obviously containing event/administration gear.

How to telescience

Setting up your lab

First off, you'll want to put on a Radiation Suit found in a Radiation Closet by the doors. The Telepad will emit random radiation waves that will Irradiate anything in the room.

Depending on if you wish to enter and exit the Telepad room, you may set the two portable scrubbers at max power in the chamber. Overtime, the Telepad will generate Plasma gas and catch fire. In order to properly cool off the room after a scrubbed fire, you may require to setup a cooling system. Some will bug the Atmospheric Technician to install a Air Alarm, whilst others will simply remove the wall to Toxins Storage.

Still on the subject of scrubbers, you may want to borrow the two Huge Air Scrubbers in Toxins Storage and turn them on using the Area Air Control computer. It'll help speed the process.


Using your lab

Now that you've got your equipment on, you're ready for action! Take one of the GPS devices on the table and go put it on the telepad. Make sure to remember it's ID! Now go to that fancy purple console and bring it up. You'll see multiple buttons. Begin by clicking "Recalibrate". You should see a "Calibration Successful" message. Proceed to setting the X and Y values to 100. Set the Z level to 1 (Station level). If you don't see the coordinates update, Close and open the computer again. Once that's done, click the Send button. Now go nab another GPS device on the table. That ID you remembered set earlier? That's the one you just warped. Say the results are (108, 98, 1). This means the telepad is 8 over on the X value and 2 under on the Y value. So the offset is -8X, +2Y ! So say you really want to send the GPS to (100,100,1). You'll have to set the telepad to (92,102,1)!

Sadly, every 10 to 20 teleportations (roughly) the Telepad will fizzle. This means you need to click Recalibrate and start from step 1. Learn to recalibrate quickly, or you may end up in a heap of trouble.

Leave handy beacons around the station, and GPS units at interesting locations in space, and you can easily find them again. It's worth putting something down in the Medbay so you can quickly send the wounded and the dead there.

Challenges for the Robust in All of Us

  1. Be useful and teleport dead bodies to Genetics for cloning, or injured crew straight to Medbay for treatment!
  2. Teleport an Engineering Cyborg straight to a hull breach!
  3. Borrow all the Chef's donuts!
  4. Teleport the last remaining revhead into the Brig for implanting!
  5. Find the remaining Bananium ore and construct a H.O.N.K. mech for the Clown!
  6. Teleport the Nuclear Device around during a Nuclear Operatives -round! Bonus points if it's right after they stick in DAT FUKKEN DISK and before they input the code! Double bonus points for teleporting it to the derelict!
  7. Teleport a bomb onto a malfunctioning AI's core!
  8. Teleport the Woody's Got Wood reader into LORD SINGULOTH!